#19 What Next?
May 20, 2017, was the day I thought I always wanted. It was on this day that my academic career would come to an end. For the last 16 years, my life revolved around tests, assignments, and grades. Finally, I would be free of the procrastination monster and really begin to live life without having to worry about what number would appear on my next essay after it was graded! Free at last, free at last, thank God almighty I’m free at last! Walking across the stage, the culmination of my efforts was presented to me in a green tube, accompanied by a congratulatory handshake and smile from the president of the college. Down the stairs, back to my seat, and 45 minutes later out the door, commencement was over. The last 16 years of my life had led me to this point! Everything I had worked for compiled into this very moment! I had done it; I was a college graduate! Then, as if I had been hit by a semi-truck, the thought struck me: “What next?” It was over.
Have you ever been lost in a process? The plan you created is set up just right and you’re doing what you set out to do. However, at some point, whether it’s during the plan or at the end of it, you feel lost. It is unnerving, frustrating, and honestly a bit confusing at times. Sometimes you wonder, “I’m doing exactly what I thought I should be doing, so what’s going on?! This is my dream, my plan, my purpose, right?” The answers that we come to begin to make less sense to us. Switching between majors, we are desperately trying to find the place where we “fit” into God’s plan for us. Graduating and looking for the areas or jobs where we can be effective in carrying out His will, or at least, what we think His will is turns into an exercise of irritation and patience for some of us. Working a job for a long time and debating whether it’s time to move on adds to the sense of mental and spiritual fog at times. Most people either have or will feel, lost at some point in their lives. Searching tirelessly for that place, that space in the puzzle of life where they perfectly fit. We search, and search, and search, losing energy and sometimes patience with our own selves, crying out to God: “Where do I fit?!” “Am I just wasting my time here?!” “What next?!”
This is something I’ve been dealing with over the past few years. Being lost is frustrating because there are moments where you are not even sure what’s wrong. “What’s wrong?” If I knew the answer, I probably wouldn’t be here, but instead dealing with the thing that’s bothering me. Instead, my mind begins to play over the infinite possibilities but yields no immediate answer. The more I ponder, the further away the answers seem to get. I want to get out of this mental place as fast as possible so that I can feel as though what I’m doing makes sense! What if, though, that’s the problem? What if I’m so busy trying to find the way that I’m missing the entire purpose of why I am where I am?
I can only imagine what crossed Joseph’s mind during his journey to become the second most influential person in Egypt. First, he is sold into slavery by his own brothers and given to a man named Potiphar! “Why am I here?” “How could my brothers, my family, do this and sell me into slavery?!” (I know the plans) While there, he worked hard and eventually climbed the ranks to become the second-in-command over the household, eclipsed only by Potiphar. This position, however, would be stripped away from him when Potiphar’s wife lied and accused Joseph of making advances towards her, knowing she was Potiphar’s wife. Joseph is sent to prison on the word of the wife. (I know the plans) Devastated by the course of events, I can only imagine what Joseph was thinking. “God, what in the world is going on?! Why has this been allowed to happen to me?! I’m so confused and hurt!” While in prison, he climbed the ranks and was eventually given authority over all the other prisoners. This put him in a position to meet the Pharaoh and assist him with a request. Eventually, this leads to him becoming the second in command over all of Egypt. (I know the plans)
Why was Joseph where he was during those moments in his life? He, probably, had no idea. Feeling lost and unsure of the next step is part of being human! Throughout his experiences, there were plenty of times where he was confused and upset by how situations resolved. However, there is a key thing that Joseph consistently did that set him up to be used by God. He did his best at whatever task was set before him. Here’s the thing, trying to figure out how to get from point A to point B isn’t our job. We do it or try to because it makes us feel secure and gives us a sense of stability.
The issue that this presents, though, is that we can get so caught up in finding that right path. Think about this for a moment. How can we completely and effectively prepare for a future that isn’t promised? The truth is, we can’t. There are steps we can take to “prepare” for what may happen, but there is no way we can plan out exactly how we will go through life. Fun fact, our God tells us not to worry! (Prepare, but don’t worry) “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matt 6:34) So instead, we are to give our best to whatever has been set before us, regardless of the task. Our lives are like a giant puzzle, with each piece representing a different aspect of ourselves and our experiences. They, in time, will come together to form the picture of our existence, and the person putting the pieces together is the Creator. We are only responsible for being available to be used by God, not for trying to work out His mission in our lives. The Master knows his plans for us, and he’ll work them out if we follow him. (Thank God too, because I have a hard enough time deciding what I want for lunch sometimes!) College grads, keep these words in mind as you are preparing to transition from academia into adulthood: “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Scriptures for the Week:
Genesis 37 – 41 (Joseph’s journey to power)
Matt 6:34 - Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
May the Lord bless you in all that you do!
